Emphasis on the odd. What happens when Nancy and Kathie keep poor innocent CBBers awake.
St Clare's House Characters:
CBB member, Kathie Ferrars, Nancy Wilmot
19 Jun 2011 Updated:
22 Jun 2011
PAIRING: Nancy Wilmot/Kathie Ferrars
NOTES: I wrote this at 3 o'clock one morning when Nancy and Kathie (particularly Kathie) simply wouldn't shut up. To be honest, I'm not sure it really belongs anywhere outside my head. I wasn't originally planning to move it over from the CBB, but then Kathryn said she wanted it, and I was feeling guilty over not having written any more of WMK, and I found a little extra snippet of this that I'd written a little while ago and never posted, so I thought I'd post that for Kathryn as consolation, but it wouldn't make much sense without the bits that preceded it (not that it makes an awful lot more sense with them!) so I'm posting it all.
SPOILER WARNING FOR DRABBLES REFERENCED WITHIN: This little piece of late-night-lunacy will make far more sense if you read these drabbles first - plus, they're really fantastic drabbles which will make anyone's life more fun. In order of appearance:
Let's talk about... well... you know by jayj
All Change by Beecharmer
Adding to the Pile of Good Things by Abi
Where You Belong by jayj
The Extraordinary Bunny Dispersal Unit by jayj
No Place Like Home by jayj
Jo's Biggest Challenge by Vick
A Different Kind of Shepherd's Pie by Vick
1. Yibble from Nancy and Kathie by Eleanore
2. On the subject of chairs by Eleanore
3. Late nights on the CBB by Eleanore
4. Joey offers advice by Eleanore
Yibble from Nancy and Kathie by Eleanore
NANCY_W: Sleeping like that is not normal. KATHIE! ::shove::
KATHIE_F: Ow! Help, Nance! What happened?
NANCY_W: Umm, you... fell out of bed. Never mind that now, come and look at this.
KATHIE_F: Easy for you to say 'never mind', you weren't the one that just got attacked by the floor. What am I supposed to be looking at?
KATHIE_F: It's a computer. So what?
NANCY_W: Not that - look at what's on the screen. It's about us. We're in another story.
KATHIE_F: Well, I don't think much of it so far. I report to Hilda and go to bed? Thrilling.
NANCY_W: I'm assuming there is going to be more. Someone's just knocked at your door. I expect that'll be significant.
KATHIE_F: I still don't care. I'm going back to bed.
NANCY_W: Someone's not at their best at 3am, are they?
KATHIE_F: No, you're decidedly irritating at 3am. Shut up and let me sleep.
NANCY_W: Kathie, come here and look at this!
NANCY_W: Kathie, come on, I know you're not asleep.
NANCY_W: If you were really asleep you'd be snoring.
KATHIE_F: I do not snore! You take that back, Nancy Wilmot!
NANCY_W: See, I knew you were awake. Come here and look at this.
KATHIE_F: I looked already.
NANCY_W: Not that, something else.
KATHIE_F: How about I stay here with my eyes closed and you just tell me about it?
NANCY_W: Everything we say is appearing on the screen.
NANCY_W: I told you. Come and look.
KATHIE_F: ::looks:: Huh.
NANCY_W: What do you suppose it is?
KATHIE_F: How should I know? I was asleep! When did it start?
NANCY_W: ::scrolls up:: Umm, it seems to have started when I was- You know what, I don't think it's important when it started.
KATHIE_F: Let me see.
NANCY_W: ::scrolls down, very quickly:: You were right, we should go back to bed, never mind all this, we really need our sleep-
KATHIE_F: Nancy Wilmot, you get out of the way right now and let me see! ::scrolls up::
NANCY_W: Kathie, my love, don't be mad-
KATHIE_F: You pushed me out of bed.
NANCY_W: I was just trying to wake you.
KATHIE_F: By pushing me out of bed.
NANCY_W: You're very difficult to wake, you know.
KATHIE_F: So you pushed me out of bed?
NANCY_W: What else was I supposed to do?
KATHIE_F: Not push me out of bed?
NANCY_W: Kathie, darling, please shut up about the bed.
ELEANORE_L: Both of you shut up. It's 3am, for goodness sake. Don't you people sleep? All I can hear is you constantly yapping away, and I really wish you wouldn't. I get up at 5am, can't your conversation wait until then?
KATHIE_F: ::points:: It's her fault.
NANCY_W: It was not. It was your fault.
KATHIE_F: No, it wasn't.
NANCY_W: Yes, it was.
KATHIE_F: It wasn't.
NANCY_W: It was.
ELEANORE_L: Do you want me to write a scene where you smother each other with the pillows?
KATHIE_F: You wouldn't!
NANCY_W: Would you?
ELEANORE_L: Do you really want to find out?
KATHIE_F: Goodnight, Nancy.
NANCY_W: Goodnight, Kathie.
KATHIE_F: Don't I get a kiss?
NANCY_W: Only if I get one too.
KATHIE_F: And don't I get a-
ELEANORE_L: ::types:: Nancy and Kathie fall asleep instantly and don't wake up for at least seven hours, no matter what happens. ::ponders setting fire to the School while they're asleep:: ::decides to save that for next time::
On the subject of chairs by Eleanore
This snippet was prompted by jayj's fabulous Let's talk about... well... you know
KATHIE_F: ::reads:: Nance?
KATHIE_F: What is this thing you can do with a chair?
NANCY_W: ::grins:: Me in particular or people in general?
KATHIE_F: I was thinking specifically you, although I assume it might work for other people, whatever it is.
NANCY_W: You do realise I have no idea what you're talking about, my love?
KATHIE_F: Here, in this drabble. What do you suppose she's suggesting? And do you think we can do whatever-it-is now?
NANCY_W: ::frowns:: My education must be sadly lacking. A chair? I can't work out what she's implying.
KATHIE_F: That's a shame. It sounded like it would be... fun.
NANCY_W: Mmmmm. It certainly sounds... intriguing. Does she give any more details?
KATHIE_F: ::scrolls down:: No. ::pouts::
NANCY_W: ::reads:: Although she does write that it was something Biddy suggested...
KATHIE_F: Oh, my love, you are clever. ::departs to find Biddy and interrogate her on the subject of chairs::
Late nights on the CBB by Eleanore
This chapter owes massive thanks to Beecharmer's All Change universe, Adding to the Pile of Good Things by Abi, and Where You Belong by jayj.
KATHIE_F: ::wakes:: Nance? What are you doing?
NANCY_W: ::looks guilty:: Nothing.
KATHIE_F: Are you still on the CBB?
NANCY_W: Umm, if I said 'no', would you believe me?
KATHIE_F: No. Now log off and come to bed.
NANCY_W: I will, I will. Just two more minutes.
KATHIE_F: You said that an hour ago.
NANCY_W: Just let me finish this drabble.
KATHIE_F: You said that an hour ago too.
NANCY_W: But you're in this one...
KATHIE_F: Doing what?
NANCY_W: ::grins:: Everything, by the sounds of it. At the moment, you appear to be drunk in charge of a treehouse.
KATHIE_F: I'm not!
NANCY_W: ::smirks:: See for yourself...
KATHIE_F: ::reads:: Hmmm. I don't think I like the idea of us sleeping apart. And we don't argue like that.
NANCY_W: We do argue a little bit.
KATHIE_F: We don't.
NANCY_W: We do.
ELEANORE_L: ::mutters:: Oh, for heaven's sake, not this again.
KATHIE_F: ::looks nervous::
NANCY_W: ::speaks in a low tone which carries less than a whisper:: And apparently you're an exhibitionist. It says so right here. ::scrolls:: ::points:: ::grins::
KATHIE_F: I am not.
NANCY_W: You are.
ELEANORE_L: ::coughs significantly::
KATHIE_F: ::very quietly:: There's nothing about chairs in this drabble, is there?
NANCY_W: No, no chairs.
KATHIE_F: ::sighs:: Pity.
NANCY_W: There is a herdsman's hut though.
KATHIE_F: ::perks up:: Really?
NANCY_W: Yes. Although there seems to be something of a waiting list for it.
KATHIE_F: Let me see!
NANCY_W: And the author outed Matey.
NANCY_W: You can read it later. I want to catch up on this one with the Doctor.
KATHIE_F: ::pouts:: I didn't think doctors were your thing, Nance.
NANCY_W: I'm not in this one. It's Hilda and Nell who seem to be busy with him.
KATHIE_F: ::chokes again:: Hilda and Nell? Busy? With a doctor? Really?
NANCY_W: Yes. No. Umm. Not busy busy. Just busy. And not a doctor, the Doctor.
KATHIE_F: ::looks bewildered::
NANCY_W: We really do need to get that television.
KATHIE_F: You're just looking for an excuse to watch more Muppets.
NANCY_W: You watched them too!
KATHIE_F: I didn't go and buy the pyjamas though, did I?
NANCY_W: ::grins:: Are you jealous of my new pyjamas?
KATHIE_F: Well, you might have bought me some as well. ::pouts::
Joey offers advice by Eleanore
There really wasn't supposed to be any more of this. Truly there wasn't. I blame Vick for feeding the plot bunnies ;p
Drabble references, in order of appearance:
(Drabblers Playpen in ETAF on the CBB); The Extraordinary Bunny Dispersal Unit by jayj; Where You Belong by jayj; All Change by Beecharmer; No Place Like Home by jayj; Jo's Biggest Challenge by Vick; A Different Kind of Shepherd's Pie by Vick
NANCY_W: Kathie Ferrars, didn't anyone ever teach you about sharing? It's my turn on the computer now. You've been on it ages.
KATHIE_F: You'll have to wait, I'm doing something.
NANCY_W: Something more important than staking our claim to the caravan in the playpen?
KATHIE_F: ::grins:: Nice idea. But, yes.
NANCY_W: What are you doing?
KATHIE_F: Sending a formal complaint to A-WRABBIT.
NANCY_W: ::looks puzzled:: But you're not a member of A-WRABBIT. What can they possibly have done to you?
KATHIE_F: Just look at these plot bunnies they've been sending out. One of them broke you. Actually broke you. I'm not happy about that at all.
NANCY_W: If it comes to that, I wasn't too thrilled with the one that dropped you down that hole in the cave.
KATHIE_F: Not to speak of the one that killed us both off - and separately, to put each of us through as much angst as possible. You see my point?
NANCY_W: Of course I do, but it is only fiction, Kath.
KATHIE_F: It is not, it's incipient sadism and it needs to be stamped out. What happened to all the nice bunnies that had us moving in together or getting caught in herdsman's huts?
NANCY_W: Now you mention it, they have been in rather short supply lately. How long has it been since we last took advantage of Hilary's hospitality?
KATHIE_F: Too long, if you ask me. I'm starting to wonder whether the happy bunnies have gone on strike.
NANCY_W: Surely we can't be the only ones affected? What about Joey? That's a potentially fatal illness her bunnies have lumbered her with.
JOEY_M: Did I hear my name? What about me?
NANCY_W: We were just wondering whether you had any advice on dealing with renegade plot bunnies. Kathie and I appear to be suffering quite badly from them at the moment.
JOEY_M: I'd suggest shepherd's pie. Or maybe a nice casserole.
JOEY_M: Or you could try them in a stir-fry, if you prefer.
KATHIE_F: You cook them?
JOEY_M: Waste not, want not. No more plot bunny and a free dinner.
NANCY_W: ::googles rabbit recipes::
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